This is all too CRAZY for me

I'm just tired and this is just too much for one mind to handle....

?

I just don't know how I'm going to make it through this?

Daddy...I miss you!!!!!!!!!!

Daddy,
I short note to let you know that I miss you! Today has been so hard. I walked in the house today and your picture was on the refrigerator. Noah walked in behind me and ran up to the picture and said," that's my Granddaddy." I told him "yea that is Granddaddy." Today Noah, me and David went to Uncle Vernon's and Aunt Carolyn's house and we sit there and talked about you and Momma. All I could do was cry. I miss you Daddy...I want to hear you voice again and see your smile. I want to be able to walk in your house and see you sitting at the kitchen table and walk over to you and kiss you on your forehead and tell you that I love you.
I miss so much about you Daddy. There are no words that can describe how much I miss you. My heart aches. I know that you are not in pain and that you are in a better place but that does not make the pain any less. That does not make me miss you any less.
Daddy, please know that I will never stop loving you and I will miss you forever.....and always, I love you Daddy!

A very difficult past 2 weeks

This will be one of the most difficult post that I will ever write. The first man that ever loved me died Sunday morning around 7:30am. I along with my brothers and my husband was with him when he passed away. I am so thankful that he didn't suffer. That being said I must say that I miss my Daddy. I never thought that I would lose him first. I know that I miss him so much that I can hardly catch my breath. I don't know who I will call when I have the questions that only a father can answer.
I have asked my Daddy a million questions (maybe more) in the 45 years that I had him with me. I just don't know what is going to happen at this time and point in my life. I have Momma to take care of. She is sad...very sad and I don't know if the ALZ is going to trigger something or not. She was so said at the funeral and then she spoke at the end of the grave side service and told how much she loved Daddy and how much Daddy loved her. Her memory faded and she forget what she was talking back but she Thanked God for him and all the time that they had together.
I hope that everyone is doing well and as always...take care and Peace, love and happiness....

Can you believe Snow is South GA.?

Yes, we had snow here Friday night and it was so beautiful. Okay, I will admit that we did not get but 2 inches and it lasted over night but I was so happy to see it. I was so amazing. Me and David had dinner reservations with friends and we went. It was so different (that is the only word that I can thnk of) to drive in snow. It was just so nice to see it snow again.
Daddy did not have the seed implants done. He has been so sick lately. In and out of the hospital with the flu. David has been sick and we have been at the doctors' office every week for the past 2 months and he was there today and will have more test done next week. Today is his birthday...and he was at the doctors' office.
Momma is momma. Good day and bad days. I do have a question? When they are going into different stages does their emotions seem to change for the better or the worse. The past few weeks she seems like she is just happier, and she does not seem as depressed as much. Or that is the way that I see her. We have been spending alot of time together. I took her out to dinner the other night and we had to so much fun. Daddy bought her a new car ...a Lexus..so I drove her car. She wanted catfish so we went to a seafood resturant and she eat fish.
I hope that everyone is doing well and staying warm. We have been having alot of rain lately and then the rain turned into snow Friday afternoon. Imagine that ...in South GA. Take care and as always...peace, love and happiness!!!!!

Christmas Time

It is Christmas time and everything is well. We are wanting on Santa to arrive tonight for the grandbabies. Noah and Skylar are so excited and we are excited to see their faces tomorrow when they get here. We are excited that all the grandbabies will be here and my sister and her family will be here with us. Momma and Daddy will not be here. Daddy is still sick and we are going to the Cardologist Thursday the 31st. He is having to get medical clearance for the seed therphy procedure. It has been postponed until we see the cardologist. I am in hopes that this will be re-scheduled in the New Year. Momma is doing as well as can be expected.
I hope that everyone has a wonderful and joyous Christmas with family and friends and that everyone has a Happy New Year. And as always...peace, love and happiness.....

Sorry...under the weather..

I'm sorry that I have not posted sooner. I had surgery on the 15th and I seen the doctor for the post-op visit. He told me that it looked like an A-bomb had exploded inside of my body. I had scar tissue on my stomach, colon (he didn't remove this), intestines and around my belly button. He said that he hopes that this is not a recurring problem for me. I pulled a muscle under my right rib cage and that has been a problem for me for the past two weeks. I have never pulled a muscle and I hope that I never pull another one. I have been in so much pain. I will be out of work for another week, trying to heal from this.
Daddy will be having treatments for his cancer hopefully before Thanksgiving. His urologist is out of the office due to having surgery on his back and he will not be back in for another 3 to 4 weeks. The oncologist that we have chosen to treat Daddy seems to be a great doctor. He answered question after question when we were in the office last week. The plan at this time is ..seed therpy, external radiation 5 times a week for 5 weeks, and hormone therpy. Daddy has lost 6 pounds in 3 weeks and the doctor is hoping that Daddy will put on some weight while we are waiting on the urologist to return to work.
Momma seems to be having some really bad days lately. She is just not in a good mood and she seems to be angry all the time, with everyone. Especially me and Daddy. The only thing that I know to do is just not feed into negative. Is this just a part of this awful disease? There are times that I want to scream, just get in my car and scream but then I realize that I will not accomplish anything but giving myself a headache so ....
I hope that everyone is doing well..and that the weather your way is nice. One day it is hot here and then by the weekend it is cold. Take care and peace, love and happiness.